The Rude, The Lucky And The Jammies – Christmas Shopping With The Joys

OB Christmas Tree

Rock-Star Shopping And Rude Cart Rogues

With it being Saturday and only 12 days left until Christmas, I decided it was time to get some gift shopping underway. I love Christmastime. The Joys and I got our 6-foot scrappy looking tree on Wednesday. I took Joy 1 to see “White Christmas”, a live production at the North Park Theater on Thursday night. Friday, I worked a lucky 13 hours which will help cover the cost of Christmas and earned me the weekend off.

So, Saturday was going to be the start of more holiday fun. Joy1 and I went to the dollar store to stock up on household basics and we quickly realized the crazies were out in full nasty force. Parking lots jammed, shopping carts banging, hogging isles, blocking shelves and abrupt attitudes were rampant. That stop was short lived and on the way out Joy1 stated that the store was full of immigrants and old people. Wasn’t sure if I should have been shocked by that comment or just agree. I spent a hundred dollars there and at checkout felt like a rock star. Apparently, the old immigrants don’t stock up quite so aggressively and rude people were taking over the town.

Even A Bull’s Eye Needs To Smell Good

Back in the car, I realized there was a Bath & Body Works shop across the way so we decided to pop in there for some smell good gifts. We are informed by the perky, pretty woman greeting us with a shopping bag as we headed in that the store is having a “Buy 3, Get 3 Free” event that very day. We needed nothing but bought everything, got our 3 Free, indulged in another 3 item discount, picked up some completely unnecessary massage oils, 4 types of men’s cologne, (why?), and splurged on a couple of impulse items in the check out line. If anyone is a rock star it was our cashier for dividing our items into 3 purchases so that we could maximize the maze of store deals. There was a big, fat bull’s eye on my forehead yesterday. Lucky for that store it is Christmas time.

Clark Kent Was A Real Man, Too

Later in the day I took the Joys to Target and found myself people watching outside the fitting rooms while Joy1 tried on Yoga pants.   By the end of my 10-minute wait I had transformed into an old white moth after watching: 2 twenty-something females who must be on a reality show from the way they glared at the clerk for the 6 item limit and left their cart blocking the entrance to the fitting rooms. Someone should have told them that reality stars don’t shop at Target.

Then: Adult male 1 enters fitting rooms to try on Batman pajamas.

A moment later: **Ring, ring** Clerk answers phone and tells caller they are sold out of the ugly sweaters.

Shortly thereafter: Adult male 2 enters fitting rooms to try on Batman pajamas.

Eventually: Joy1 comes out but Joy2 goes in to try on shorts.

I start looking for the hidden camera as: Adult male 3 enters fitting rooms to try on Batman pajamas.

So, it seems that Target scores one point for Rude and earns the Big Win for grown-up men wanting to sleep as superheroes. Plus, the Joys decided on the way out that Target smells better than Wal-Mart.

Last stop was Dicks Sporting Goods – the name alone gets points for Lucky and on top of that we got Lucky… the store because Joy2 ‘s cellphone fell out of his pocket and was found by the manager and was back to us in minutes. Yay, Lucky Dick’s!

The day ended with Christmas movies all night, baking banana bread, wrapping gifts and trimming the tree. It was a busy day littered with luck and rudeness and oddities but having a terrifically sappy ending.

About theblogwoman

Bull-headed, focused, loyal. I pay attention. Don’t underestimate me: good and bad. Watch what happens when you start coming with me.
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